Well for those who know iam still here. With out baby. Yup today is my first due date. And nothing. I have been taking homoeopathic pills to help bring on labour but it has don't nothing yet. and i took them this morning... so ... i swear this kid is not coming out.
I'm starting to feel down in the dumps now. I know iam at the end and still there is nothing. Iam going crazy every little cramp i am thinking could this be it... could this be the start. And then again and again... nothing. I feel like crying all the time now. I'm scared about going out and doing to much in case something happens. I scared about being alone in case something happens. Looking after Lucas is getting so much harder. I can chase him when he runs around. I mean don't get me wrong Gary has been home and is doing everything he can to help. Getting up really early with monkey butt when he is up at 6am. And is there when he wakes up in the middle of the night. I mean he is a great daddy and husband. But he too is feeling ready for the baby now. So if he is ready... wow what am i feeling. LOL... I just feel at this point nothing i wanted to happen again with this one is going to happen. So many things i want to do for my labour and that but i have a feeling iam going to be made to stay in the bed and do nothing. But scream my head off.... cuz dumbass me wants to do it with out drugs this time. What the hell am I thinking. .... someone smack me please. its OK i wont hold it against you... well for now anyways. LOL... hint hint Jessica. LOL
right now iam relaxing with Lucas as he watches DORA again for the millionth time today. God help me.... Is this my life. ? ? ? ? ?
what happen to becoming a famous dancer and writer? where did she go? I know she now looks like an over grown whale. Who can't see her feet. and is slowly losing her mind.
I have no clue if any of this makes sense... but oh well... Iam way over due and to pregnant to care what you think..... LOL. love you.
I have no clue if any of this makes sense... but oh well... Iam way over due and to pregnant to care what you think..... LOL. love you.
2 comments:
Aww hunny. He HAS to come out eventually. He just really loves you and doesn't want to leave. He's a mama's boy already. Isn't that awesome?
You still get to be everything you want to be, but with more life, more experience, and more shutzpa to express.
Even if things don't go exactly as planned, they go exactly the way they're supposed to.
We love you, too.
I know hun your having the hardest time right now. I've told you that hes coming out and when he does aunty jess is having a big talk with him.
I know it seems like you've lost yourself but that'll change you know we were there when the first set were getting older. Your still you just with little boys to love.
And believe me they don't give out medals or rewards for delivering without drugs, This I know for fact cause no one gave me anything for that.
So hes coming out
You'll get your drugs and you'll love him to pieces.
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